


and henceforth he shall nevermore return

by elviniard



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 22:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5516177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elviniard/pseuds/elviniard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>because he feels it like the susurrus of a rising storm, and he knows<br/>he once and forever knows<br/>that this will be the end of him</p>
<p>It's time for them to say goodbye.</p>
            </blockquote>





	and henceforth he shall nevermore return

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Coyoteclaw11](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coyoteclaw11/gifts).



> I hope you enjoy it. ((I'm so sorry.))

_because he feels it like the susurrus of a rising storm, and he knows_  
_he once and forever knows_  
_that this will be the end of him_

 

Haru looks at the duffle bag where it sags against the scuffed leather of Rin’s boots. It’s ragged, the green of the cloth worn to an almost-brown, and lumpy where flare-bags must be stowed in its outside pockets. 

 

He looks and catalogues each detail away, grasping for adjectives to pour into the gaping calm of his mind. The ocean roars in his ears, and he welcomes it, thinking-contemplating-musing- to avoid the  _ why _ of the bag’s appearance. To ignore the reality of the statement that has so shaken his world.

 

But the words peeter out, and he is left with the silence that greets a coming storm.

 

“I- Haru, I meant.. it’s-”

 

Haru turns his eyes to Rin himself, still so shocked that he can pretend to be detached. Rin shifts, uneasy, guilt and resolve and desperation all chasing one another through the microcosms of his expressions. He rubs a hand over his face, and Haru watches the old scar stretch out, white against the rest of Rin’s darkened skin.

 

“Rin.” The name slips from him unbidden- it’s empty and unintentional, a Teller’s worst nightmare.

 

Rin stills, then tips his head up to look at him in one sharp movement. His eyes are wary.

 

It’s then that the last of the protective cold wisps away from his body, and it loosens, all strength gone. If he hadn’t been sitting when Rin had seen fit to tell him, he might have fallen- even now, he slumps against the rickety wood.

 

It reminds him, viscerally, of their sixteenth summer, when Rin had tried to walk out of his life, the only person who understood the pulsing beat of the words like he did, for whom the words  _ sang _ like they did for him-

 

Rin.

 

“Why?” It’s better this time. Though he doesn’t bind the word with magic, it’s full of meaning, and will cut to the quick of the matter. Rin’s Telling is- was? beautiful, flamboyant and complex in its ambition. But Haru is all too aware of the limited time they have left, and won’t allow Rin to waste even a precious moment of it.

 

"I have to. After Gou- I can't hide, Haru, I'm sorry, you have to understand-"

He could deny it. He could let himself sink into the slow stirrings of fury beginning to unfurl in his gut.

 

But Haru  _ knows  _ Rin, and his understanding runs deep into the core of him. Years ago, it had taken only a handful of words and honesty to drag Rin back to his side, but since? The Fall had stretched its fingers into everything that they’d ever known and loved, and what it hadn’t completely obliterated, it chipped at, piece by piece.

 

Gou, spread-eagled on dirty rubble, the slick shine of her blood making her hair ever redder. Nagisa’s face when all they’d managed to salvage from the wreckage was a mangled pair of glasses. Makoto clutching his siblings’ hands, with two missed check-in’s and counting.

 

Yamazaki, voice loud as he’d demanded Rin enlist with him, palms sparking every time he’d lifted a hand.

 

And Rin, with charcoal forever embedded underneath his nails, who no longer smelled of ocean.

 

So yes. Haru knows.

 

He cannot dissuade him. He cannot follow him, either, and though that has been true since the day the shrapnel sliced through Rin’s left cheek and the tendons of Haru’s calf, he cannot help but regret for but a searing moment that it was Telling, only Telling that he had poured his very soul into.

 

But regrets have no place in this moment, not when Rin is still before him with that awful macabre mix of conflicting emotions on his face. Haru rises, stumbles as he puts too much weight on his left leg.

 

Rin starts towards him, and he uses the momentum to launch himself into his arms.

 

They hit the ground hard- Rin grunts in pain and rolls them over, knees carefully braced against his thighs. Before he can straighten up, Haru grabs at his stupid, stupid face and pulls it in.

 

He kisses Rin roughly, frustration driving him to nip at his lower lip and drag his hand through choppy hair. Rin makes a muffled sound of surprise before diving in, licking his way into Haru’s mouth. Haru’s thoughts scatter after that, brief details registering before they’re forgotten as he tries to relearn Rin through taste and touch. Tries to drink him in so that he might not forget, that please,  _ God _ , that he might come home.

 

The gong chimes from Center Square, startling them both. The reverberations themselves shake the ground under his back, and he closes his eyes, overcome momentarily by the hatred the sound inspires within him.

 

“I have to go.” Rin pulls away from him, slow, and there is conflict written in every tense line of his body. Haru shifts up onto his elbows. There’s no time left to drown in fury or self-pity. He looks at Rin, reaches out to slide his hand down that beloved face, trying to smooth out the wrinkles that bunch together around his eyes and between his brows.

 

“Haru- Haru I-” For a Teller, he thinks with a hint of amusement, Rin stumbles a lot with words. Forever tumbling over them, twisting them to dance around what he means to say.

 

But Haru’s Telling has always been famed for its simplicity, and he reaches for his spool of words one last time, to give Rin one last gift.

 

“I love you.” He Tells him, weaving magic into the intonation of his speech, pouring all of the passion, the anguish, the joy, the peace, the rage- every shade of every emotion that Rin had ever forced him to feel into the greatest spell that he’s ever uttered.

 

Rin’s face crumples in on itself, and they’ve come full circle. He smiles, small and quiet, as Rin openly cries for the first time in years, says nothing as Rin’s tears drip-drip-drop onto his own face.

  
The gong rings out again, and Haru lets Matsuoka Rin go for the last time.

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas, everyone!
> 
> The prompt: Kissing like their entire lives depend on it omg Especially if rly serious things are going on around them and like they're never going to see each other again and it's their absolute last kiss. If it's a fic, all I'd really want is like for it to be just a single scene from what seems to be a larger more intense story. Like so much has happened, but this only details their last moment together and that desperate kiss. It doesn't have to involve death or anything but something happens that's going to separate them. You can go totally nsfw if you want, but I really really want that kiss to be the absolute center of it all. The main focus. Bonus points A+ if it's a ind of heart-wrenching angsty fic that makes the reader very frustrated and want to cry.


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